Last year I lost my Dad. Not an unexpected passing. In later years we had very little to do with each other but the loss was real and painful. You remember past moments of happiness and hold onto those.
I have nothing left from my parents lives. Not an ornament, not a painting, not a book. Nothing but memories. There were things but they were "removed", "deleted", "disappeared". A past life expunged and sanitised. I guess in a number of ways that included me. Well,it certainly feels like it to me.
I may not be as close to my children as I'd like but that is their choice, not mine. I have been and will always be accessible, approachable and here for them. They have their own burdens to bare and they must carry them as they see fit. Love is blind to all these nuances thank goodness so I am content in the way of it all.
To this day I wish I could tell Debbie things and ask her things. She is never far from my thoughts. As the ancient Egyptians believed, you never really die until no one remembers you and speaks your name. Debbie. There. x